A spiraling DIP

My moods been everywhere lately, and yes stress has a big part in it.
stress about finances, work, future, and other insecurities brought on by life.

seconds away from claiming insanity, and drowning in tears of frustration, I finally take in a deep breath... and let it all out.

"its not the end of the world" is what I used to say when i needed to center myself.
and when that stopped working, I bawled like a little girl lost at the super market.

instead of a horrible panic/ anxiety attack and a series of depressed thoughts that lead to the black pits of my mind's hell, he tells me to step back and take it in bits at a time..

so that's what I'm doing.
after all, when your eyes cloud over with all the bull shit, who better to guide your way than the eyes of someone with their head put on straight.

... then I realize how lucky I really am, and have been...
and I think back to all the things in my life that got me this far and it amazes me that I'm still somehow alive through it all.

I've been strong before and like the mark I bare, I will be strong enough to face it all again.